Teen Counseling

Are You Concerned About Your Teen’s Behavior And Wellbeing? 

Does your teen seem isolated, detached, angry, overwhelmed or persistently sad? Perhaps you worry that they are staying up all night or engaging in risky behavior. Is your teen struggling academically, having trouble making healthy relationships or seeming to find little purpose in life? 

Do you worry that these issues stem from a larger problem, such as ADHD, depression or anxiety? Regardless of the specifics, you may notice that your child doesn’t feel accepted for who they are, and you want to find a way to provide the insight, guidance and support they need to overcome challenges and thrive. 

Watching your child suffer can be scary and troubling, especially if they are abusing substances, isolating, acting out of control or falling far behind in school. If your child is struggling with issues related to trauma, anxiety or depression, they may be experiencing mood swings or withdrawing from you and your family.

These kinds of distressing emotional and social issues—on top of the hectic school, work and extracurricular schedules—lead many teens to a perpetual negative thinking that fuels anxious and/or depressive cycles. As your teen becomes more impulsive, introverted, defiant or distracted, you may not know how to get through to your child, and worry that you’re unable to provide the help they need.  

Many Teens Struggle

If something seems to be holding your teen back, they are not alone. Many teens struggle to navigate the new and often confusing social, emotional and developmental changes in their lives.  Teenage brains are developing at a fast rate during these years, bringing about both challenges and benefits related to increased emotional intensity, social engagement and novelty-seeking and creative exploration. And, these changes are happening just as teens are faced with new challenges of identity, independence, relationships and academics. This can often leave teens feeling lost, misunderstood and isolated. 

When typical teenage development is coupled with mental illness, there is often even more difficulty. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, 20 percent of youth ages 13-18 live with a mental health condition. And, 50 percent of students ages 14 and older with a mental illness drop out of high school. 70 percent of youth in state and local juvenile justice systems have a mental illness. Considering these stats, these issues require professional attention. 

Warning signs of behavioral, mood or anxiety disorders may differ. They include:

• Self-harm

• Risk taking behavior

• Sudden overwhelming fear for seemingly no reason

• Eating problems

• Drug and alcohol use

• Sleep issues

• Difficulty concentrating

• Sudden changes in mood

• Engaging in destructive relationships

• Risky sexual behavior

• Isolation or avoidance

• Aggressive behavior

• Difficulties in school

Environmental changes, loss, and peer conflicts can lead to and/or escalate emotional and behavioral problems. You should pay particular attention if your teen experiences:

• The loss of a loved one

• Parental separation or divorce

• Any major transition—new home, new school, etc.

• Traumatic life experiences, like living through a wildfire here in California

• Teasing or bullying

• Difficulties in school or with classmates

In addition to these common contributors to stress, teens these days are under a lot of pressure to perform. In California especially, colleges are incredibly competitive, living prices are high and the need to “look” successful is deeply ingrained in our community. With our “always on” and electronically “connected” culture, teens can easily get caught up in the dangerous trap of comparing the realities of themselves and their lives to the filtered and enhanced timelines of their peers and other influences. Watching real-time postings of a party they weren’t invited to, feeling as if they’re falling short of some perceived social or cultural expectation, feeling misunderstood, confused and different, teems can find themselves caught in a cycle of isolation and low self-esteem. 

The good news is that teen counseling can help. If your son or daughter has been showing noticeable shifts in behavior, suffering from low self-esteem or struggling to function well, counseling can provide the effective coping tools and communication skills needed for long-term health and wellness.

Teen Counseling Can Help Your Child Thrive

Teen therapy can be incredibly effective in helping teens process pain and gain healthy insights about themselves and the world around them. When someone is experiencing a problem or concern, they often want to talk through it. However, teens may worry that their parents or friends are too close to the issues to provide helpful, unbiased advice. 

In a compassionate, confidential environment—outside the stressors of school, extracurriculars and home—your teen can openly express concerns and receive non-judgmental support and guidance. Whatever your teen is struggling with, they don’t have to go through this alone. 

During teen therapy sessions, I seek to relate to your teenager on their terms, in accordance with their values and beliefs. Your teen can expect to receive education about neurodevelopment, social and cognitive stages and changes and common challenges (and opportunities for growth) impacting teens, as well as insight into how stress impacts the mind and body. 

Your teen will have the opportunity to explore their own individual values, strengths and talents.  Depending on their particular needs, your teen and I will work collaboratively to identify specific challenges, triggers, thought patterns, emotions, beliefs and behaviors that may be limiting their ability to resolve conflicts, connect with others, and thrive socially, emotionally, and educationally. We’ll develop specific ways to manage stress, process and express emotions and choose behaviors that meet their needs in positive ways.  

Every teen’s experience is different, so my approach is individually designed to capitalize on your child’s strengths and identify and overcome weaknesses. With that being said, the skills I draw from often include mindfulness, cognitive behavioral techniques, journaling, social conflict resolution skills, communication and self-advocacy. 

With the ability to feel more balanced, empowered and aware, your child can learn how to transform this troubling time into an opportunity for growth. This is an invaluable skill that can not only serve your child now but better equip them to face challenges down the road. 

Everyone wants to feel heard and accepted. Teen therapy provides your child with the space to share his or her story and carefully examine and process whatever may be hindering him or her. With the guidance of an experienced licensed clinical social worker—with two decades of experience—it’s possible for your teen to develop their strengths, have more satisfying relationships and adopt a more positive outlook on life. 

Your teen is struggling, but you still have questions or concerns about teen counseling… 

My child won’t go to therapy. 

In my experience, most kids are relieved to find a place where they can talk freely about themselves and their lives. With that being said, resistance is very common among teens, and is something that we address in therapy. I’m no stranger to ambivalence or oppositional behavior, and I’m really good at helping teens open up to the therapy experience.  

I’m worried about the cost. 

Although there is a cost involved with this work, I encourage you to consider the cost of continuing on without help. If your household is persistently disrupted and everyone is unhappy as a result, wouldn’t you like effective tools to address and resolve those issues? Wouldn’t you like to feel more relaxed and connected to your child?

I feel like I’ve failed as a parent. 

There are a lot of myths and misconceptions about what teenagers are going through. During adolescence, it’s completely normal for child–parent relationships to change. It’s a natural adjustment, but if you’re not aware of what’s happening or if the changes seem abrupt, of course you feel out of touch, lost and confused about what’s going on. When more significant emotional or behavioral issues are a factor, that disconnect can be even greater and more concerning.
With the right guidance, education and support, you can learn more about this phase and feel more equipped to communicate and foster a healthy bond with your child. 

Teen Therapy Can Help

If you’re living with a troubled teen and are interested in teen or family counseling in Ventura, CA, please call 805-444-8787 for a free 30-minute consultation or to schedule a free face-to-face consultation. I am happy to answer any questions you have about teenage counseling services or how my practice can address your needs.